It wasn’t until I was in sixth form that I opened up to my mum about my mental health. She noticed my behaviour was affecting my everyday life, including college, and we had a conversation about the appropriate steps we could take going forward to find a solution. She booked a doctor’s appointment for me and that’s when I was diagnosed with social anxiety and depression.
I was in secondary school when I developed mental health problems and started to self harm. I had experienced a lot of bullying from my peers and I felt very isolated and low, often spending lunchtimes sitting in a toilet cubicle or in the library studying alone.
It all started when I noticed Adam’s behaviour had changed. He became quiet and started to isolate himself, staying in his room more than usual. He was irritable too, getting upset about things which wouldn’t normally bother him so much. Looking back on it now, he was just feeling frustrated – he didn’t understand why he was feeling the way he was.
I have always been someone who worries about things, letting them take over my mind, no matter how big or small the issue is. I remember at school things like public speaking and having to do presentations in front of a room full of classmates would send me into meltdown, causing me such worry and stress for weeks leading up to the event.
It started with feeling irritated over small issues. I didn't look forward to spending time with my baby. My in-laws would make me loose my nerve. For no reason at all, I was getting angry at home. Even in the office, I didn’t feel like working anymore. I was losing enthusiasm for life and struggling to enjoy the things that would usually make me happy.