For a long while, I've been having issues with mental health. I remember asking my mum one day years ago if hearing and seeing things was normal and her response still sticks with me. "You're too young and don't know what REAL mental health problems are."
My battle with anxiety started during summer 2018. From when I was diagnosed I knew I was about to embark on a tough and challenging journey. Not just me, but everyone who was close to me as well. It was really hard to come to terms with the fact that it would take time to be okay again and even harder to accept that it could hit me again at any time.
My diagnosis of BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder), or the UK name EUPD (Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder) was at first a major blow, but then I realised I finally had a name for this shadow that had been following me around for the last 20 years and, more importantly, I wasn't alone.
The words that describe what we live with do not define us – we are more than just a neurological clinical diagnosis, we are complex human beings.
I was 23 years old, I had found the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with, and I was feeling content…and then out of the blue, a bombshell came that was going to massively affect my life. My wife, being a caring and compassionate person, tried to help a family member financially, and was left with their crippling debts. We stuck together through the two years of fixing the damage, but it took so much out of me emotionally. Sadly our relationship has never been the same.