The diagnosis of bipolar eight years ago was a huge relief because I finally knew what was wrong with me. I was so relieved because I said – ok, so I am not lazy, I’m not erratic, I’m not unfocused. I’m sick.
I got the diagnosis before I got married. My then boyfriend (now husband) was ok with it. But some of the people in his circle were like, “no, no, no, no… you should not get married to her, how you will be able to cope with her condition?”
It's very easy to avoid answering the question ‘how are you?’ - and to be honest, how many of us ask this question out of habit, not really expecting an honest answer? I know that I sometimes do and would be quite surprised if someone said, ‘I feel pretty rubbish actually’.
I know that I avoid being honest when someone asks me this question as I'm worried that others are not really interested, that I’m boring and that I may be perceived as weak and unable to ‘cope’. I blame my childhood and the fact that we had to display ‘a stiff upper lip’ and just ‘get on with it’.
Hi I’m Nayena, a young champion for Time To Change. I love writing, art, and music. Nothing makes me happier than good vegan food. My friends say I’m a calm, witty, and positive person. I’ve also been diagnosed with depression and anorexia. For too long, I’ve been terrified of speaking out about my mental health. But here I am, telling my story.
I can’t quite believe how much my life has changed since my previous blog in 2015. I left my science communication job to become a science technician (never leaving science education, obviously!), and my personal life has had some massive upheaval too.
After self-harming for almost a decade, next week will mark three years since I last self-injured. Before I sat down to write this (and unwrite some parts and write this again), I was reflecting on my experiences since my self-injuries became scars.