January 15, 2009

Hello. Thanks for visiting my blog. It's a bit odd for me to write with a focus (or even slant) towards stigma and discrimination as these are a relatively minor part of my lavish mental illness experience.

Perhaps I should start with a quick intro. Hmm. Now is the moment when I have to prioritise the elements of my identity. This is usually context-driven, so I could swiftly decide to describe myself on a tax self-assessment thingy as an exceptionally honest 49 year old with no off-shore, on-shore or unsure investments. And for a dog lovers' club as being owned by the world's cutest, hairiest scruff-bag.

But for an anti-stigma website? Well I'm still 49 (unless it takes me over 8 months to complete this posting) and my friends would say that the maddest thing about me is how besotted I am with my dog. My psychiatrist/therapist would respond to that analysis with a characteristically almost imperceptible eyebrow-raise. And scarcely a glance at what could be mistaken for a snoring rug lying on the floor between us.

Actually, the whole thing about my friends out agedly rejecting my diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder raises interesting (for me, at least) issues about stigma. Eligibility criteria for friends would eliminate anyone who passionately feels I have a personality disorder. But I still find frustrating their dismissal of my having BPD, however supportively it's intended.

I'll probably sound off in another posting about how stupid, inaccurate and offensive the label 'borderline personality disorder' is. For now, I'll just mention that it's a heavy-duty psychiatric condition, manifesting itself in emotional instability and intensity (especially of the intolerable psychic pain variety), and most of us use self-harming as a 'coping mechanism'. Being suicidal is often part of the Deluxe BPD Package, and one which unfortunately dominates my allocation of BPD.

I hate having BPD but it was a relief to eventually discover that it's the reason for such a bizarre and incapacitating range of symptoms. (I did a classic Internet self-diagnosis, 6 months into weekly therapy with a specialist BPD psychiatrist, in a specialist PD unit. He's impressively economical with handing out diagnoses, especially ones with ludicrous names.)

What part might stigma play in my friends' reaction to me having BPD? Their motivation is the opposite of, and probably intended to partly counter-act, a view that mental illness reflects or proves inferiority. And they hate the implication of the name. But what if being mentally ill was no more stigmatising than having leprosy? Oops, bad example. Then, say, having a chronic back disorder? They might mutter about the stupid label and empathise about having a nasty medical condition, but feel as relieved as I do that there is a reason for my symptoms (and related dysfunctional behaviours) and that this has enabled me to have very specialist treatment for it.

Share your story

Too many people are made to feel ashamed. By sharing your story, you can help spread knowledge and perspective about mental illness that could change the way people think about it.


Borderline Personality Disorder

<p>I would be interested to know what this specialist treatment that people have had for Borderline Personality Disorder as i have had several rounds of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and inter personal therapy over years and nothing has been helpfull so the mental health team disposed of me saying that they couldn't help me.</p>

Treatment for BPD

<p>The newfangled treatment for BPD is Mentalisation Based Therapy.</p><p>Like you, I had CBT but it was only partially effective.</p><p>Also, don't let them fob you off as unhelpable.</p><p>Good luck.</p>


H.. I have been referred for CBT, Doctor diagnosed me as depressed and anxiety. I am going to see him next week. I feel like I am going mad at times. I relay all conversations I have had out loud to myself when I am on my own. I have strange dreams, and I find it hard at times to define what was a dream and what is reality. On so many occasions I search internet, just to `self diagnose`,. This is 1st time finding BPD, reading about it, and others blogs, maybe thats me


I have had the same experience over and over again the mental health teams disposing of me and saying 'they can not help me' I too have had several rounds of CBT and a round of inter personal therapy but unfortunately DBT is not available on NHS in our area. I also went on a course to help mental health sufferers get back into work and on the second appointment was told I was not ready to go back to work even though the government say I am at the end of the day there is no real help out there always find I am on my own again and again

DBT not available

Hi hun. I am totally amazed they artheredoing DBT on the NHS in your area. I can not understand why they feel it far better to send people to CBT, even several times over than, than DBT. I know it is expensive re training therapists as well as the time people are on therapy, but to me, if the amount of 'cost' to the NHS for other treatments people with BPD Is compared, over the time, surely there would be little difference if not more financially better for the PCT. I was fortunate to to DBT for 3 years and literally found it life changing. It has proven so beneficial that the PCT are continually train CPNs so there is a constant service within the community. I really hope they reconsider this decision as CBT is only an interim therapy for BPD.NFb5SN

treatment for bpd

I HAD A DIAGNOSIS WHEN I WAS 17 but no-one bothered to explain what it was with name like that I just thought you mean I don't fit into other known boxes so you just call me " nearly something but not quite anything". So I went on for the next 32 years not really fitting in any boxes or into most roles the modern world demanded. Anyway this year I'm fifty and with the dawn of internet I too researched bpd thinking maybe I should find out whether that was a real thing after eliminating everything else over the years ( bi polar, autistic spectrum, aspergers, you name it I tried to find an explanation for the way I was.Guess what it described my life and my behaviour to a tee. I was relieved and worried. I still worry about being first to the gas chambers if I embrace this diagnosis. Or having it used against me at some point. I'm a single mum and the fear of having mental health problems used against you by powers is always looming and had to weighted up with the slim chance of getting support because you have a label. MAYBE it sounds dramatic but these are the real fears I have brought my child up having ad an extra burden to live with. Can you imagine a mother with arthritis or multiple sclerosis being persecuted due to a physical disability it is illegal. (even though it does happen too). Anyway I have decided to give it one last shot to improve this condition Ive had to live all my adult life with.I'm starting group analytical therapy on 16 Nov2015 and this time I pray It will reach the Parts no other therapy has come close to dealing with and the second half of my life can be a bit better. Please don't give up eventually you will get there In my experience bpd , makes you strong every time you pull yourself through you are one fibre stronger.

BPD treatment

Hello. I tried two lots if CBT with no benefit then after my diagnosis I was give Cognitive Analytical Therapy which did help and then a dialectical behaviour therapy course which is designed for BPD. That helped too.


I had bpd and I am now in remission. I did write a blog for the site but am still waiting to see if they can use it. I blog on wordpress too. I suffered domestic violence both community and in relationships which were always hidden and never dealt with because the so-called professionals felt it was my fault, even though I did not cause it. These people need to step back, and take a look at the reality and severity of someone vulnerable struggling to bring up her children in such frightening situations. I have never been violent, usually the victim made to be silent because anything gets held against me or no one believed me. We do need to get more information out there, because contrary to popular belief, someone with borderline is more likely to get hurt, than hurt someone else. I was terrified in my position, I tried shouting out but sadly no one listened, they were too busy blaming me and ignoring reality.

What did you think of this blog? Tell us in the comments