Zoe, February 19, 2018

Picture of blogger: Zoe

Depression and anxiety, what do they mean to you? There is a lot of coverage on these topics at the moment and, in my opinion, rightly so. Mental health is something that has been affecting so many people, for such a long time, and only now does it feel acceptable to talk about and open each other’s eyes to the struggles people face daily.

I have suffered with anxiety for many years. I have also probably suffered with depression, although I’ve never been formally diagnosed. For me, I’ve always struggled to open up and tell anyone. Why? Why should I be ashamed of the thoughts and feelings going through my head? Well that’s just the thing; those thoughts and feelings are relative to me. They’re relative to what I am facing and how I manage to deal with those issues.

Yet that doesn’t stop people with the questions; “Why does it bother you? Why can’t you chill out? Why can’t you relax?!” Well, maybe if I had any answers to those questions I wouldn’t feel the way I do. I already feel silly, I already question my emotions on a daily basis, so do you think I need anyone else questioning that? That is why I’m glad people are finally speaking out and finally addressing the questions and the negative opinions surrounding this matter.

What do depression and anxiety mean to me? It means struggling to get out of bed in the morning. It means fighting back the tears while sitting at my desk and putting on a brave face while inside I feel like everything is being screwed up and I can’t breathe. It means trying to concentrate while inside my head I have constant battles and arguments. It means getting angry and pushing away the ones I love the most because I’m adamant they’ll hurt me if I don’t push them away first. It means wanting to sit in a room on my own and not interact with the world but missing everyone and everything at the same time.

I fake my way through most days and some days that gets exhausting to the point where I can no longer put on that brave face. But what I will say is, anxiety doesn’t make me who I am. Sometimes my brain likes to think it does. Some days I feel like I’m not a person, just a shell, but for the most part I will fight. I will fight to be the person I once was. I will fight to be the happiest I have ever been. I will fight to let people in and not shut that door.

I am still me; I’m just a little fragile some days and I just need someone to stop, think and ask, are you ok? And to tell me they’re there. I don’t need advice, I don’t need people telling me I’m “being stupid.” And I most certainly don’t expect you to understand. But by being there, and taking a moment to think, you could save someone’s life. You could be the reason they’ve got a smile on their face. You can make a difference.

It’s time to talk. Don’t shut the world out! Share your stories and help each other - it may surprise you how much you have in common. No one should be alone in this world, so remind someone they’re not

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Share your story

Too many people are made to feel ashamed. By sharing your story, you can help spread knowledge and perspective about mental illness that could change the way people think about it.


Love the blog

Love this.thank u for your inspiration and support..I also suffer from severe.depression and anxiety for long time..and its very hard.and a lot of people don't know how to handle my thoughts and feelings or talk to me about it..this is great help

Thank you so much for sharing

Thank you so much for sharing this! I totally agree that no one should feel ashamed of their mental health problems. You wouldn't shame a diabetic for being sick, so why shame someone who had a mental illness? You are brave. Know that you are not alone. Mel from Mental Healing and Recovery


I'm so alone. I'm alone inside, I'm alone outside, I'm alone emotionally, I'm alone mentally, I'm alone spiritually, yep - I'm also alone physically. I literally am empty. I have had quite a journey these 37 years and the man above put me here - but I didn't ask to be here. I'm to the point. I don't exist anymore anyways and I am exhausted. Thanks, and I hope you have a good day! Jolene

Sorry you're struggling

Hi Jolene, sorry to hear you feel so alone. Have you reached out for any support at all? If you're experiencing mental health problems or need urgent support, there are lots of places you can go to for help: https://www.time-to-change.org.uk/mental-health-and-stigma/help-and-support Take care, Dom at Time to Change

why feel ashamed of mental illness

l was diagnosed many years ago with a mental illness and understand about the daily mental struggle many face. l would like to do something in the time to change campaign this year but there does not seem to be any events in the birmingham area. l have done time to talk for the past few years and would like to do something else

I had the same problem

Great job on sharing your thought. I struggled too with the same problem. I talked to many people about it but didn't quite get the help needed. Did some research and found this.

I'm glad that people are

I'm glad that people are brave enough to share their experiences with depression and anxiety. I've been diagnosed 'depressed' for over two years and I still can't talk about how it makes me feel. People like you are an inspiration to those (including myself) who can't talk about how they cope and function ... So, thank you for sharing x

Thank you.

I have suffered with mental illness the same as you for my whole life but none more than a year ago where I was scared of my own thoughts. I just wanted to say thank you, you have put what I feel into words and I wish people could understand but most can't so its nice to hear from someone who understands what I have and am going through. x

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