Clichés are everywhere in our day to day lives. Whether they are the photograph's subject in an art gallery, a news headline or a politician's speech, we soon grow tired of them but at the same time barely realise when we are using them ourselves.
When you tell someone how you're feeling and they respond with one of the dreaded clichés, it is important to consider that the cliché is perhaps the replacement to being lost for words and appearing like they don't care. Although sometimes, you can look into the eyes of someone telling you "It's just a bad day" and see that they really don't care; they are too busy thinking about what happened on TOWIE last night and wondering why this person doesn't just shut up and pull their socks up. But that's no loss to you because it is unrealistic to expect everyone to care or want to show an interest. Even your closest friends can be left flummoxed by a tearful friend on the end of the phone and just want to say something to comfort them.
I don't think we should be angered by clichés
Thinking about the clichés I have faced in the past, I have found they have come from people who have never had a mental health problem or known someone with one (yet), so have never been able to relate. As soon as the words are uttered or typed at me, I know that they don't know. But that's OK. I don't think we should be angered by clichés, I think we should see it as a chance to gently tackle them.
So when someone says you're just having a bad day, don't bite their head off. This is where I find it hard to recommend what to do next. When people see me having a "bad day" it's normally when I'm in tears, flinching and struggling to breathe, for others it may be them clamming up, or punching a wall. But when I am physically and mentally able to, I explain that I have been this way since I was 14, and that I never want to outwardly act how I do or drag anyone down, but sometimes my mind gets the better of me, and that I'm sorry.
getting past that cliché and explaining what that person is seeing
To be fair on that particular cliché, I am actually having a bad day, so it is really rather apt. It's just getting past that cliché and explaining what that person is seeing. To them, it is not logical that you've freaked out because someone has dropped something, entered a “no go zone” in your office (seriously, can they not see the reception desk?!) or sneezed. I'm not saying everything has to be broadcast and explained to everyone, just understand that they don't understand! Some want to know more, some don't.
there are so many different clichés, scenarios and mental health problems out there and I know this piece won't reach everyone
I have found it hard writing this as I never write much about my depression. It's not that I'm consciously scared to, I just almost feel I'm glorifying it by giving it my time and space to write about it. I just get on with it as a day to day fact of my life. Also, I’m constantly correcting and questioning what I'm writing for this as I know there are so many different clichés, scenarios and mental health problems out there and I know this piece won't reach everyone. I also dread to think how many clichés I have used in this blog!
I guess for me, the only way to end this piece is with a cliché. Things will get better....then they will get worse, but then better again. And I know I will come across many more clichés and many more glazed over eyes, but I also know that for every cliché I see and hear, I have plenty of wiser words waiting for me out there (sometimes it's me saying them!)
