Your mental health is so much more important than a night out

“Cheer up or you’ll ruin it for everyone else” is something I tend to hear on days that are supposed to be happy. Nicky's blog Holidays are a time when everyone is meant to be so happy, but having a mental health problem doesn’t get a day off, even on birthdays, days out or celebrations.

I often find the ‘happiest’ times the most difficult times

I often find the ‘happiest’ times the most difficult times; birthdays, celebrations, days out… and it’s difficult for the minority of people to understand sometimes. Holidays can be so difficult because everyone around me has a massive genuine smile and I feel like I have to fake a smile for the sake of others. I think there are too many expectations of what people should do, and what makes something a good, happy or comfortable time of celebration. For some people, celebrating a special occasion is all about partying, but for me I need my own space, so to take care of my mental health I just spend it with some of my closest friends and family. Everyone has different ways of celebrating and it’s important not to risk your mental health because of the way other people like to celebrate: do whatever is best for you.

Sometimes I still need to ask for help and that’s OK

Luckily I have a supportive family and an amazing group of friends that are always there to talk when I need to. Talking about how I’m feeling can seem like such a small thing but it makes a huge difference, as it takes a weight off my shoulders and I don’t have to suffer with mental illness on my own. The truth is, recovery takes a lot of time and patience. People around me can sometimes assume that because I have been discharged from the mental health system that I’m fixed now. But I’m still human; I have good days, I have bad days and I still struggle. Sometimes I still need to ask for help and that’s OK, there is no shame in that and there never should be.

It’s okay not to be okay

It’s so important to ask for help if you need it. You don’t have to hide your pain behind a brave face. If you bottle it up, you will explode eventually. It’s much healthier to think of yourself, take time out if you need it and face the world again when you’re ready to. Whatever time of year it is, remember that your mental health is so much more important than opening a present or a night out; it’s okay not to be okay.